I have now experienced the weddings of both of my daughters. There are really no words to adequately describe the emotions that travel through the soul of a mother during the wedding season of her daughter. My words may ramble and my thoughts may be jumbled but I think it is important to put them down on paper for my own daughters and for other moms and daughters.
The preparation for a wedding is exciting and exhausting. The thoughts and emotions during the wedding season are like a roller coaster…a really big, scary, rough roller coaster! Things have crossed my mind like…He is such a wonderful young man! My prayers have been answered. Does he love her enough? Will he be able to support them financially? I am so proud of them. They make a beautiful couple. He needs to grow up. God is going to use them in amazing ways to reach people for Christ! Will he treat her right? She isn’t old enough. What will life look like after she is married? Will she call me? Will she need me at all? Will they move far away? Will she be happy? Thank you God for giving her a husband that loves You and wants to serve You! They are so cute together. Is he paying attention to her? Is she happy, really happy? I trust You God. You are in charge of this event and these two special people. Thank you God for the gift of marriage and the love I see in these two. I could add so many more to this list and I know many of you could add to the list as well. And to my son-in-laws who will hopefully read this at some point in time…It is not because I didn’t like you…it is because I love her so much and will be her support and protector until I take my last breath. And now I love you because she loves you. You are my son.
To my daughters: the act of God’s creation within my own body. I was your first earthy dwelling place. You heard my heart from the inside and I felt your first movement. The joy when you first looked into my eyes was beyond description. The first time your fingers wrapped around mine I knew that I never wanted to let you go. That is the love of a mother and I will forever be grateful for the opportunity God gave me to experience it.
I am fully aware that you were never completely mine. You were God’s before you were ever mine, and His love for you far exceeds mine (even though that seems impossible). I am so thankful that God chose to share your life with me and place you in my care. We have laughed and cried together, struggled as you were finding your identity, acted silly, argued, gone on adventures, talked, listened, and loved. Every second has been precious to me.
How do I step back and allow another love to fill your heart? It seems impossible until I remember that you were God’s first! His plans are what allow you to experience life to the fullest. I truly believe that God designed marriage to be a completion of ourselves here on earth. It is an opportunity to practice Godly love; unconditional, abundant, deep, sincere, selfless love filled with grace and mercy every single day. A Godly marriage develops Christians that are better followers of Jesus because of their daily practice of love for their spouse.
The two of you together, hand in hand; still unique individuals, still on your own journeys, now add a new adventure to your life. You are now made stronger by being intertwined into a strand of three with God as the anchoring strand. You have the opportunity to experience the world in an exciting and new way; together!
My prayer for you, my precious daughters – and you, my sons…is that you will:
always keep God as the center of your own life and your marriage.
keep God’s word active in your home through study, conversation, and practice.
pray together daily.
listen more than you speak.
filter your words to each other through the grace and love of God.
do fun and silly things.
never expect more of your spouse than you do of yourself.
give more than necessary and take less.
support the dreams of each other.
pay attention to the unspoken needs.
try to never be selfish.
be willing to apologize.
look for, recognize, and appreciate every blessing.
never, ever say ugly things that cannot be taken back.
not be afraid to talk about the hard, uncomfortable things.
always hug, kiss, and hold hands.
say “I love you” often and show that love through actions.
be observant of things you can do to make the other feel loved.
appreciate moments more than things.
listen to God, not the world on how to have a strong marriage.
love each other with abandon.
love God more.
I send you with my never ending love and blessing into this adventure. I am totally excited for you and can’t wait to see your story unfold. I will always love you. I will always be able to sense your deepest emotions simply by listening to your voice or looking into your eyes. So, I ask that you be honest with me and remember that I am here for you to listen and to lend a helping hand. I will sometimes offer my opinion when it is not welcome so be patient with me. I have already walked many of the avenues that you will be walking and I want to share what I know to help you navigate and hopefully avoid some of the mistakes I made and lead you to the things that were good and successful. However, this is your life and I trust your discernment and your desire to follow God’s will. I will always stand in the gap to protect you but will try my best to realize that this is now your husband’s job first. I will always pray fervently for you and ask for God’s protection and blessings over you and your family.
You will always be my baby girl. But now, you are also my dearest friend and I am blessed beyond what I could have ever asked or dreamed! I love you as big as the world and even more! I love you forever and a day!